🧠Cognitive extremism
"I thought being open-minded meant agreeing with everything. I was wrong.”
Cognitive Extremism
“Cognitive extremism isn’t about opinions. It’s about how tightly we hold them.”
As humans, we face countless decisions throughout life. Ideally, these decisions should be shaped by clarity, self-awareness, and balance. But cognitive extremism quietly interferes with this process. It creates a mental barrier — one that pushes us to think only in extremes.
Everything becomes black or white, right or wrong, success or failure — leaving no space for nuance, reflection, or growth.
The Two Faces of Cognitive Extremism
Cognitive extremism does not appear in just one form. It exists on both ends of the thinking spectrum.
1. Rigid Extremism
People with rigid thinking fear change. They hold their beliefs as absolute truths, often seeing themselves as morally superior. Adaptation feels threatening to them, and flexibility appears as weakness. As a result, they resist new perspectives, even when circumstances demand change.
2. Extreme Flexibility: Losing the Self
On the other extreme are people who bend so much that they forget who they are. In the pursuit of validation and acceptance, they sacrifice their values, suppress their voices, and become people-pleasers. Boundaries dissolve, self-doubt grows, and identity slowly erodes.
It is important to remember that extremism isn’t always loud.
Sometimes, it is silent, internal, and self-erasing.
But how does this happen?
understanding the Roots of Cognitive Extremism
Every story has a protagonist. In the same way, every inner conflict has a root.
The inability to accept ourselves as we are often arises from fears buried deep within our minds — fears that quietly disrupt our decision-making process.
Some of these roots include:
- Fear of uncertainty
- A strong need for control
- Social media echo chambers
4. Trauma or deep insecurity
5. Addiction to validation
They draw us into algorithm-driven realities and inflexible “right vs wrong” narratives, which diminish complexity and oversimplify humanity.
A REAL LIFE REFLECTION
A. The Rigidity of a Father
Maruthi, a 60-year-old man, decided early in his son’s childhood that the boy would become an engineer. Influenced by certain experiences and observations, Maruthi developed a strong belief that engineering was the safest and most respectable path.
Without truly listening to his son, he enrolled him in an engineering course, convinced that he was doing what was best.
Maruthi, a 60-year-old man, decided early in his son’s childhood that the boy would become an engineer. Influenced by certain experiences and observations, Maruthi developed a strong belief that engineering was the safest and most respectable path.
Without truly listening to his son, he enrolled him in an engineering course, convinced that he was doing what was best.
B. The Excessive Flexibility of a Son
Maruthi’s son, Ram, aspired to become a pilot. However, in his desire to impress his family and society — and to be seen as a “good, obedient son” — he never tried to truly express his dreams or convince his father.
To him, submission felt safer than choosing an unknown path.
Both examples reveal how extremism operates in opposite directions.
One controls out of fear.
The other surrenders out of fear.
Together, these extremes form an invisible barrier — one that separates dreamers from their dreams, weakens emotional bonds, and distances individuals from comfort within themselves.
Maruthi’s son, Ram, aspired to become a pilot. However, in his desire to impress his family and society — and to be seen as a “good, obedient son” — he never tried to truly express his dreams or convince his father.
To him, submission felt safer than choosing an unknown path.
Both examples reveal how extremism operates in opposite directions.
One controls out of fear.
The other surrenders out of fear.
Together, these extremes form an invisible barrier — one that separates dreamers from their dreams, weakens emotional bonds, and distances individuals from comfort within themselves.
The Consequences of Cognitive Extremism
Unchecked cognitive extremism can lead to:
- Loss of empathy
- Intellectual stagnation
- Broken relationships
- Inner conflict
- Deeply polarized societies
And many more silent consequences that slowly shape how we live and relate to others.
Unchecked cognitive extremism can lead to:
- Loss of empathy
- Intellectual stagnation
- Broken relationships
- Inner conflict
- Deeply polarized societies
And many more silent consequences that slowly shape how we live and relate to others.
The Door to Escape the Maze
Growth begins when we start working within ourselves.
When thoughts begin to hold us captive instead of guiding us, it is time to pause. Lean back. Reflect. Ask yourself where your thinking is limiting you. Identify the fear at the root of those thoughts — and uproot it.
Freedom arrives when we break free from our caged thoughts, reshape them consciously, and allow them to guide us toward purpose rather than fear.
Now, it’s your turn.
Find the root.
Eradicate it.
And let us fly together —
in the open sky of harmony, peace, and purpose.
Thank you.
~Yathem Meher Priyamani
Growth begins when we start working within ourselves.
When thoughts begin to hold us captive instead of guiding us, it is time to pause. Lean back. Reflect. Ask yourself where your thinking is limiting you. Identify the fear at the root of those thoughts — and uproot it.
Freedom arrives when we break free from our caged thoughts, reshape them consciously, and allow them to guide us toward purpose rather than fear.
Now, it’s your turn.
Find the root.
Eradicate it.
And let us fly together —
in the open sky of harmony, peace, and purpose.
Thank you.
~Yathem Meher Priyamani
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